This week, I thought I’d do something funny. With a lack of blog post ideas in my head, I went over to HubSpot’s Blog Ideas Generator to see if it could help me come up with some topics. You have to input three nouns, so I chose “writing,” “authors,” and “books.” Most of the results actually gave me a laugh, so this week I’m going to make posts from the funniest ones on the list. Enjoy!
Think You’re Cut Out For Doing Books? Take This Quiz
This one made me laugh the most, so I’m doing it first. Take the quiz! Give yourself 3 points for every (1.) answer, 2 points for every (2.) answer, and 1 point for every (3.) answer.
How many words do you write in a day?
- At least 2,000! Stephen King says you should write 2,000 words a day and he’s the President of Writing!
- I don’t write every day, but I try to get a few hundred in when I can.
- Does typing search terms into Netflix count?
Where do you get your character names from?
- I’m very creative and they just come to me.
- I check out baby naming sites and glean them from real life and stuff like that, but sometimes it’s difficult.
- Everyone in all my stories is named Bob.
How many books/stories do you have published?
- Tons! I’m a very busy and extensively-published author!
- I haven’t published anything yet, but I’m submitting things to editors/agents.
- Publishing? You mean like when I write rants on bathroom walls?
How do you handle rejection?
- It’s disappointing, but I consider every rejection a learning experience!
- It’s really discouraging, I still struggle with it.
- Reject me? No one would dare reject me. The last editor who rejected me, well…let’s just say they got a special “fruit basket” for Christmas.
How do you feel about editing/revising?
- I love it! I live fixing up my work up and making it the best it can be.
- It’s not my favorite thing, but I know it’s an important part of the writing process.
- Everything I write is perfect the first time. I send everything directly from Word to Kindle Direct Publishing without even running a spell check. Who has time for edits!
How long have you been writing?
- I was born with a pen in my hand! (Ouch, my poor mother!)
- I started writing in school and found out it made me happy.
- Since yesterday, but I’m pretty sure this is my year to win a Pulitzer Prize.
How do you feel about the success of other authors?
- I’m very happy for them. Their success doesn’t mean I won’t be successful too!
- It makes me envious, but I try to use that to motivate me.
- All other “authors” are going to retire now that I’m here.
Do you write in one genre?
- I picked one genre and I’m building my brand in it.
- I’m experimenting with different genres, still trying to find my niche.
- I invented six new genres and I have the top book on Amazon in all of them.
Are you good at writing query letters?
- I know all there is to know about query letters and I write the best ones! I’ve gotten so many offers from my great queries.
- I try to learn all I can about querying, but it’s not easy to write an effective query letter.
- Who has time for letters? I just show up at their office with my handwritten manuscript to add that personal touch editors love.
How do you construct a plot?
- I write an outline, fill in details as I write, keep note cards, annotate my manuscript, and check with beta readers to make sure everything makes sense and I haven’t left any gaps.
- I kinda just try to write and hope it works–I usually fix the plot up in the revision stage.
- I just steal the plots of Stranger Things episodes and change the character names.
Okay, now add up your score and see how you did!
24-30 pts: Oh, look at Perfect Author over here. Go write your 2,000 words before Stephen King astral projects over your keyboard and curses you with weak plotlines and adverbs.
15-23 pts: You’re pretty much a normal writer. Congratulations! You’re full of anxiety and uncertainty like the rest of us, but you’re trying.
10-14 pts: Uh…I don’t think you’re cut out for doing books. You’d make a great politician, though.
How did you do?