For the Blogging From A to Z Challenge I’m doing you all a huge favor and filling you in on the 26 Things To Hate About Writing.** I’m hoping by the end of April, I will have convinced all of you not to indulge in the wild insanity of becoming a writer. If I can save even one person from offering themselves up in sacrifice to the mad and fickle word gods, I will have done some good in this world.
Grammar. I guess we’re supposed to learn it, or something. If you don’t, you’re going to be dealing with one of those editor people I told you about and they’re going to make you fix everything and put it the right way. There’s always a critic, restricting your creative freedom. I don’t know about you, but I don’t not never like nobody messing with my creativities.
One of the worst things about writing is getting your grammar right. It’s a branch of science that’s always changing, and here’s what’s going to happen when you go back through your manuscript and try to correct your grammar mistakes:
– On the first look through your manuscript you’re going to think you completely forgot even the most basic of grammar and wonder how you got this far in life. I’ll tell you what happened. Writing makes you stupid!
– You fix everything up and on a second read-through, you still find more crap you messed up. Writing is the worst!
– It turns out things you thought were correct for years really aren’t. One day you learn something new from an editor and it changes your entire world. This is what you get for writing books: disillusionment.
Cultivating a mastery of language and all the intricacies and rules involved is an ever-growing skill, and learning it is invaluable to your writing and life in general. It makes you smarter, more coherent, and your work more readable. But HONESTLY, is that what you want? You could instead drink a six-pack (or a pot of coffee if you don’t drink alcohol) and write sixty pages of raging, scattered, incoherent diatribe about your pet peeve of choice and, my friend, that’s called art. Let me tell you, the world needs more art!
**Disclaimer: If you haven’t figured it out, these posts are pure satire and simply a humorous way to vent my writing frustrations. No offense is intended to anyone. Please, become or continue being a writer. It’s awesome, I swear. It’s super…duper, awesome…heh heh.