Shit Romance Authors Say

I’m sure by now you’ve seen them floating around the internet: those videos that depict “Shit (demographic/race/people/gender) Say.” If not, allow me to direct you to YouTube (some of those videos may contain offensive material, so watch at your own risk!).

I have zero video making skills, so I thought I’d do one of these presentations in blog form. Here is Shit Romance Authors Say:

– It’s not smut, it’s erotica.

– What’s another word for ‘throbbing?’

– Just because he’s a werewolf doesn’t mean he’s not lovable.

– So you’re telling me you don’t see fireworks every time you kiss someone?

– He’s a billionaire…she’s a billionaire…what if everyone is just billionaires?

– Can you make a Wendigo sexy? What about a zombie?

– Is it considered HEA if she leaves him chained to the bed–but he likes it?

– I need to find an anthology for my leather daddy/tax accountant story!

– Sexy, sizzling, scorching…it’s okay to put all those words in the blurb, right?

– The publisher wants a 300 word synopsis for my 80,000 word novel? You have got to be kidding me.

–  Whoops, I used ‘turgid’ twice in three paragraphs–glad my editor caught that!

– If the FBI ever gets their hands my Google search history…

– Follow Friday!

–  Cat: check. Coffee: check. Now I can write.

– I need a new blog post idea. But I think I already wrote about 101 Practical Uses For Handcuffs.

– I don’t know where to take this story next. Time for a sex scene!

– Got a bad review: reviewers are just jerks shouting their opinions to the masses!

– Got a good review: reviewers are so wise and awesome!

– Did Amazon do anything evil this week?

– I hate Facebook’s new timeline.

– These two characters just met. I think the most practical decision is for them to have sex.

– I think I should add some sex here.

– What holiday is coming up next? I need to write a story about people having sex on that holiday.

– Hey, writing sex is hard. Heh heh, hard…

Do you have any to add to the list? Come on down!

By the way, today I’m part of Long and Short Reviews 8th Anniversary Party! Come on over and enter to win TONS of stuff, including $100 Amazon/B&N gift cards!

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