This post is part of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group blog hop. The first Wednesday of every month is Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. The awesome co-hosts for the March 4 posting of the IWSG will be Chemist Ken, Suzanne Sapseed, and Shannon Lawrence!
Yesterday was the release of my first urban fantasy novel, The Wicked City, from Kensington Publishing! An exciting day for sure, one I’ve been looking forward to for a long time. I can’t believe it’s finally here. So all my insecurities have vanished, right?
Ha! Not even close!
Here’s my shiny new book:
The Wicked City – Siren Song #1
She’s got a voice to die for…
Whatever June Coffin says, goes—literally. And it’s not just because she’s a chain smoking rebel. As a Siren, June has the ability to force people to obey any command she voices. But in a world where those with supernatural powers quickly become lab rats for science, she’d rather look out for herself than fight on the front lines…until her similarly gifted twin brother, Jason, is captured by Chicago’s Institute of Supernatural Research.
To save Jason, June has no choice but to enter a hidden world of conspiracy, murder—and strange bedfellows—including a widowed paranormal advocate whose memory June accidentally erased, and a fiery paranormal separatist leader. Soon the lines between attraction and strategic alliance become blurred. But in a city exploding with paranormal crossfire, and her brother’s life at stake, June will have to face her inner demons and finally take a stand.
(Additionally, I’m running a contest to win an e-book copy, if you’d like to enter.)
Beautiful, isn’t she? And certainly I’m celebrating. But, but, but…
What if people hate it? What if it gets bad reviews? What if I barely sell any copies and my publisher drops me from the rest of my contract for wasting their time? What if readers come to my house and stab my eyes out with forks for writing something so lame?
Getting the big publication doesn’t automatically mean all your anxiety and self-doubt vanishes. It’s kind of like being in love, where one minute you’re on top of the world and the next you worry the other person secretly hates you and is just leading you on. Maybe my publisher and the readers are just humoring me. But look, I have a book! I’m published, I did it! But oh God, what if they hate me?!
So it goes. That’s not to say there’s not a great feeling of joy and accomplishment in my heart, but this blog hop IS about insecurities, and there they are.
I’m going to try to bask in the glow, instead.